In exactly one month, Roman will be two years old.
He will turn two.
He'll be a toddler.
I'll be able to sigh loudly and say things like, "Sorry folks, he's two."
He'll talk back, say no, throw fits, have tantrums, pick on his sister, refuse food, drink, and sleep. He'll bite, kick, punch, and pull his cousin's hair.
Having been there before I also know that he'll splash his father when he gets a bath, he'll take the caps off his sisters markers-and not recap them, he'll throw the cats food dish and spill her water, he'll probably-at some point-play in his poop, he'll steal my phone and butt dial my doctor's office or he'll wriggle out of his car seat straps forcing the trip to come to an abrupt halt.
Roman, as a two year old will play a little longer and a little more violently with his cars, trucks, plains, trains and tractors. He'll drive them off cliffs and into tunnels, he'll crash them into the cat and he'll probably-at some point-put a small wheel in his nose.
I know all of these precious nightmares await me. I know I'll be able to handle some of them with confidence and others with tears and frustration. I know he will try me, tease me, disobey me and taunt me. I know that with his sister by his side they will be a hurricane of destruction, noise and a mystery sticky substance on the tv, couch, walls, table and my computer-which they shouldn't have been touching in the first place.
All of this-the absolute worst parts of being a two year old, the parts of motherhood some would like to fast forward through, the horrible ideas, fights, arguments and messy crafts that come with having a two year old and a four year old, I wouldn't trade. Not for a clean house, not for a day at the spa, not for a 6 hour live taping of Grey's Anatomy. Nothing.
Because once you've seen your baby like this...
You don't get too upset when you see him doing stuff like this:
Once again, I'm doing this one month before the fact, so that I can write this without running the risk of a tear generated electrocution.
If you see me this month, you should hug me, because at any given time, at any given moment I am one second away from crying. Just so you know.